Seek not happiness too greedily, and be not fearful of unhappiness.”

– Lao-tzu

With all the different ways those “Now What” moments can occur in our lives, there is one that I have not spoken of yet.  Sometimes we discover our steps to a “Now What” experience because of a disappointment. So what does that mean? Well, you know… something doesn’t go as we planned.

For my son this week, it was getting cut from his college hockey team. So what who cares!, you may say. But for him, hockey is all he knows. He has played hockey since he was 5  years old. He took to sports at an early age and we discovered hockey and later that year he was diagnosed with Attention Deficit Disorder. It did not take me long to realize the behavior that plagued him in the class room never affected him when playing sports. So hockey became his saving grace. It became his structure, his reliable source of high self esteem and within no time, his passion. When playing hockey there are tryouts all the time for competitive teams. If a player did not make one team, there was always the chance of playing on another team. So until he failed to make this team, he never faced not being able to play at all. As he told me the story of how the coaches told him that he was not in shape and therefore as much as they liked him and how he played, he was not as fit as other players so he was the last one to be cut. The shock he faced was numbing, he said to me, “Now what am I going to do? I don’t remember my life before hockey.” I was in shock too. However thanks to information I have learned watching people go through Now What? I realized that this is a turning point, a fork in the road, a wake-up call! While it appears to be the end of the world, truth be told, it isn’t. It is an opportunity for growth.

What about you? What situations have occurred in your life that took you by surprise, caught your breathe and had you feeling like, “Now What am I going to do.” I don’t think we grow without facing some adversity first. Pain seems to be a motivating factor in turning lives around. Even though we talk about making change, taking risk and starting fresh, most people won’t do it unless the pain they are in is too dreadful to continue without making a change. It is almost as if we are bullied into making a change. Do or Die!

For my son, he immediately recognized what he could have done differently. I encouraged him to stay in shape all summer but friends, summer laziness and X-Box games won. Now he sees things differently and has learned the error of his ways. He is committed to getting in shape, getting a job and being ready for the chance to try again. As fate should have it, his roomate made the team and so did his other friends, so he will have to face it every day that they did and he didn’t. He immediately recognized that they stayed in shape and worked hard and earned the right to be on the team and he had not. He was happy for them. For himself he made a committment to change. What we do with this forks in the road is what true growth is all about. How many people stay stuck in their stories, focusing on the noise, become victims and how many use it as a motivating factor for growth.

The Now What program has supported thousands through those moments and transitions.

Join me this week at Blog Radio for a live blog call in program.  Blg Radio is a talking blog with programs taped for future listening, you can attend my calling the number and call in to speak to the host while on line.

Date: Wednesday, September 12th,

Time: 6:00 PM EST, (3:00 Pacific)

Call: (646) 716-9870

Topic: Now What? 90 Days to a New Life Direction - What’s Missing From Your Life and What can you do about it!

See you there!

I like thinking of possibilities. At any time, an entirely new possibility is liable to come along and spin you off in an entirely new direction. The trick, I’ve learned, is to be awake to the moment.”

– Doug Hall

 

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